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Never mind casting virtual magic spells in Harry Potter or role-playing games, developers 666 claim that you can have access to the real thing with their new game Black Occult Order, or BOO for short.
Filled with spells, incantations, images, symbols, and rituals gathered from both ancient manuscripts, various religions, and modern occult practitioners, BOO is said to be the definitive black magic collection. “BOO is the result of more than 10 years research and development,” says 666 founder Stan Belzeb. “This is project lends itself perfectly to the video game format since it’s totally interactive. All of the spells and symbols must be assembled in private by the practitioner. It would be far too dangerous to have the spells pre-assembled in the game. The destruction caused by fully loaded spells during transport could be catastrophic,” Belzeb warns. According to the press release, BOO will empower the user with many magical attributes, including the ability to gain wealth, raise the dead, turn people into zombies, and have pickles instantly removed from your Big Mac without having to park in the Special Order zone. “We have included spells from different cultures all over the world including the Kabala, Buddhism, the Masons, Wicca, Voodoo, and some sent to us from Wal-Mart greeters. We have even included exorcism rituals from the Catholic religion should you accidentally conjure a horrifyingly powerful demon or Anna Nicole.” Marketed as more than a game, Belzeb says that BOO is no Ouija board, it’s the real deal. We contacted several Beta testers and all declined to comment. One tester made sounds like a frog while the other bleated like a goat. The third tester said that he would love to chat with us but was too busy running from a decaying corpse that was chasing him around the house with a mop. Structured similarly to a point-and-click adventure game, players enter into various chambers filled with virtual manuscripts to explore and unlock a series of magical rituals that they can use for a variety of purposes. The spells are incomplete and require that you investigate each chamber for clues to locate the missing spell components. Once you assemble the incantation, it’s time to activate them. This can be done automatically by the CPU or spoken aloud in the comfort of your own home. “With the virtual spell casting system, practitioners of the black arts no longer have to visit a graveyard on a full moon, sit inside a pentagram, or have a cauldron bubbling with eye of newt or ass of bat. The game simulates those environments for you,” Belzeb adds. “It’s hoped that BOO will reach a worldwide market and turn millions of kids into Godless demonic bastards,” laughs Belzeb. “In much the same way that video game have,” he concludes. *This article is presented as an exclusive Cheat Code Central feature titled “Are you dumb enough to believe this?” Please check back each Friday for the newest edition. |
