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GTA IV Delayed up to Eight Weeks Due to AO Rating (April Fool’s!)

GTA IV Delayed up to Eight Weeks Due to AO Rating (April Fool’s!)

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Oh woe is Rockstar! The bad boys of video game development have announced that they will be forced to delay their much anticipated title, Grand Theft Auto IV, because it has received an AO (Adults Only) rating from the ESRB.

The rating is due in part to a 15 minute, sexually explicit cutscene between the protagonist Niko, prostitutes, and several other goons inside of a Liberty City Dunkin Donuts. The scene was originally set to take place in a Starbucks, but president and co-founder of Rockstar Sam Houser preferred the “lighting and gritty ambience” of the famous fried pastry chain.

The news came as an utter “blow” to the development studio. Jim Shadee, a custodian at Rockstar’s SoHo office, stated that “I don’t know what the big deal is? They’re just trying to lend a little authenticity and excitement to the game, if you know what I mean. They (the ESRB) don’t know their @$& from a hole in the ground. Now, if you will excuse me, I got to go brew some coffee before I lose my job.”

Unfortunately for Rockstar, the editing process will take anywhere from two to four weeks and they will have to recalibrate the production process. This means the game will likely be delayed for up to eight weeks. On the bright side, Rockstar will produce a limited number of Special Edition, un-cut copies, so it will be possible for collectors and a few rich gamers to get their hands on the original offering.

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